Welcome to Resurrection Parish on this the 2^nd Sunday of Lent, and the second week of our message series, “No Offense.” Last week we looked at three key facts about offenses which form the foundation for this series.
First fact: Offenses are inevitable. Whether they are perceived or real, intended or unintended, life affords us opportunities to be offended every day. We cannot get by in life without experiencing offense nor can we get by without offending others.
Second fact: Offenses are a trap. We can spend so much time playing the victim and waiting for others to fix the offense, that we miss out on living our lives. When we take offense and hold it in our hearts, instead of dealing with it in the healthy ways we will be talking about in this series, we are nourishing hurt, anger, outrage, jealousy, resentment, strife, bitterness, hatred and envy in our hearts, we are hurting our hearts, we are fashioning for ourselves a heavy heart.
Third fact: We have a choice about how we handle offenses. We can say “no” to the temptation to hold on to an offense. If we have allowed an offense to dwell in our hearts we can choose to get rid of it, like we learned from Jesus last weekend, “Repent and believe in the Gospel” (Mark 1:15).
Today we want to look at a truth to hold onto when we are temped to hold onto offense instead. The reason offenses can grab hold of our hearts is because they can become all encompassing. When we are hurt or feel hurt by an offense, we can come to see a whole relationship through the lens of the offense. We can come to view the whole person through the lens of the offense. We can come to view the whole world through the lens of that offense. This one truth we are looking at today can give us a more proper perspective on offenses so that we see them in the right context. This truth can change our lives.
While this truth can be found throughout Scripture, we are going to see what St. Paul says about it in his Letter to the Romans. He writes, “We know in everything, God works for good with those who love him, who are called to his purpose” (Romans 8:28). In everything that happens to us, God is working for good.
Notice what St. Paul does not say. He does not say that everything that happens in life is good. Clearly, there is evil in this world. There are bad things that happen to all of us that are not a part of God’s plan.
It is important for us to remember that there is a difference between God’s perfect will and God’s permissive will. In God’s perfect will there is no evil or sin. But God has shaped us with free will and once God gives free will, people can choose evil over good, again and again.
So St. Paul is not saying that everything that happens is good. But he is saying, that in every situation, good and bad, God is working on our behalf to bring about something good. Anyone can bring good out of good. God brings good out of evil.
Notice, however, “We know in everything, God works for good WITH those who love him, who are called to his purpose” (Romans 8:28). We have to work with him.
St. Paul continues: “For those he foreknew he also predestined to be conformed to the image of his Son, so that he might be the firstborn among many brothers” (Romans 8:29).
Sometimes we don’t get what we want, our plans don’t work out; its confusing, its disappointing until we recognize: God protected us from an unfortunate commitment, He directed us around and away from a series misstep, or He spared us an incredible embarrassment. Sometimes something bad happens to us, and God uses that bad situation to introduce a better situation. In every situation God is working to bring about goodness and growth in our character to help us, “to be conformed to the image of his Son” (Romans 8:29).
When it comes to an offense, maybe God has allowed it because he wants us to grow to be more like his Son. Someone has gossiped about us and God is teaching us to be more like his Son who was called names and remained undisturbed and God wants us to be like that. Someone says something very unflattering and God is teaching us to be more like his Son who was accused of some very unflattering things and yet still loved his enemies and God wants us to be like that. Someone disagreed with us and God wants us to be more like his Son who took time to understand others rather than insisting on being understood and God wants us to be like that.
St. Paul concludes with a couple of rhetorical questions: “What then shall we say to this? If God is for us, who can be against us?” (Romans 8:31). If God is for us then people standing against us, or even working against us are ultimately of no consequence. Think about it: “He who did not spare his own Son but handed him over for us all, how will he not also give us everything else also with him?” (Romans 8:32). God held nothing back when he sent his Son. He isn’t likely to hold out on us now.
We are invited to accept that truth. And when we do, we can rest secure in it. We can live confidently in it too. Offenses don’t define us, they can’t control us.
When we are offended, however much we have been offended we are not really seeing things as they really are. So my invitation to you is to memorize Romans 8:31 but make it a little more personal. Memorize: “If God is for me who can be against me?”
The next time you are offended by someone else and are tempted to take the offense into your heart or realize that you have harbored an offense, repeat that verse. If God is for me who can be against me. Offenses never have to have the last word when we have God’s Word.