In Matthew 16:24, Jesus says that if we want to be His disciples we must “take up your cross and follow me.” Our crosses can come in all sorts of shapes and sizes.
Since becoming a priest my biggest cross has been my health. Prior to being ordained, I had had only one operation -- when I was in first grade I had my tonsils out. I do not remember spending any other time in the hospital. Now, I was never the picture of physical fitness, but I was generally pretty healthy. However, since ordination I have had ten operations. As I am sure that most of you remember, my first year here at Resurrection I had four operations, and the one hospital stay was nearly a month. It is not a question of pain, rather it is the frustration of not being able to serve as a priest the way that I would like because of recovering from surgery or having to go see a doctor. I have really learned about my own mortality, and the humility to ask for help.
I mention this because I will be going “under the knife” again this week. The short story is that what they were suppose to fix two years ago, which had complications and needed a second operation, and then nearly a month in the hospital, is still not right. I had a gastric bypass then, but as you can see, the weight has come back on, but more problematic is the reflux and gagging on food because passages are closing off. Apparently the “native” stomach has reconnected with the “pouch” that they created 2 years ago. So on Wednesday they are going to separate the two and reopen the closed off passage from the pouch. They tell me that I will be in the hospital for several days because they cannot do it laparoscopically. I have arranged coverage for the next two weekends, and plan to take off until August 1.
So what does sickness teach us? The Catechism of the Catholic Church says, “Illness can lead to anguish, self-absorption, sometimes even despair and revolt against God. It can also make a person more mature, helping him discern in his life what is not essential so that he can turn toward that which is. Very often illness provokes a search for God and a return to him” (#1501). So illness is a test of our faith; will we turn more to God, relying on His goodness and love, or will we become resentful because we are not getting things our way? We should not view sickness as a punishment from God, for we should remember what Judith said when the Israelites were facing a crisis; “let us give thanks to the Lord our God for putting us to the test as he did our ancestors. 26 Recall how he dealt with Abraham, and how he tested Isaac, and all that happened to Jacob in Syrian Mesopotamia while he was tending the flocks of Laban, his mother’s brother. 27 He has not tested us with fire, as he did them, to try their hearts, nor is he taking vengeance on us. But the Lord chastises those who are close to him in order to admonish them” (Judith 8:25–27).
During His earthly life, Jesus showed a particular affinity for the sick. He worked many miracles of healing -- from paralysis, blindness, deafness, fevers, and other disabilities. Jesus make the strong connection between faith and healing; often saying “your faith has healed you.”
Jesus invites His disciples to exercise the same compassion towards those who are ill. “‘Heal the sick!’ The Church has received this charge from the Lord and strives to carry it out by taking care of the sick as well as by accompanying them with her prayer of intercession. She believes in the life-giving presence of Christ, the physician of souls and bodies. This presence is particularly active through the sacraments, and in an altogether special way through the Eucharist, the bread that gives eternal life and that St. Paul suggests is connected with bodily health” (CCC #1509).
Let me thank you now for your prayers as I recover.